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David Krappenschitz

Toilet-humor books for grown-ups. Get smarter while you poop. 📚

📚 'Things I Think About on the Toilet' — on Amazon
 
Things I Think About on the Toilet: A Collection of Dark, Dirty, and Hilarious Thoughts for Grown-UpsDavid KrappenschitzPaperbackYour best thinking doesn't happen at your desk. It happens on the toilet — and this book proves it 72 times. THINGS I THINK ABOUT ON THE TOILET is a collection of 72 illustrated one-page thoughts for grown-ups: the morning ritual, the food regrets, the last square, legs that fell asleep, arguments won against nobody, 2 a.m. philosophy, and the warm-seat betrayal. Every page pairs one brutally honest observation with a cartoon — the kind of thing you'd text your brother at midnight. It's dark, it's dirty, it's weirdly wise — and it belongs exactly where you're going to read it: the bathroom shelf, the guest toilet, the stocking, the white elephant pile. The perfect gag gift for dads, husbands, brothers, coworkers, and any man whose real office has a lock on the door and a plunger in the corner. Printed as a handy 5.5 × 8.5 inch paperback in premium color with a matte cover — sized for the bathroom shelf.
Things I Think About on the Toilet: A Collection of Dark, Dirty, and Hilarious Thoughts for Grown-UpsDavid KrappenschitzEbookYour best thinking doesn't happen at your desk. It happens on the toilet — and this book proves it 72 times. THINGS I THINK ABOUT ON THE TOILET is a collection of 72 illustrated one-page thoughts for grown-ups: the morning ritual, the food regrets, the last square, legs that fell asleep, arguments won against nobody, 2 a.m. philosophy, and the warm-seat betrayal. Every page pairs one brutally honest observation with a cartoon — the kind of thing you'd text your brother at midnight. It's dark, it's dirty, it's weirdly wise — and it belongs exactly where you're going to read it: the bathroom shelf, the guest toilet, the stocking, the white elephant pile. The perfect gag gift for dads, husbands, brothers, coworkers, and any man whose real office has a lock on the door and a plunger in the corner. Printed as a handy 5.5 × 8.5 inch paperback in premium color with a matte cover — sized for the bathroom shelf.
Dad Jokes on the Toilet: A Collection of Groan-Worthy Dad Jokes for Grown-Ups (Toilet Humor)
 
📚 'The Naughty List' — on Amazon
 
The Naughty List: A Raunchy Little Christmas Comic for Grown-UpsMy Print ParlorPaperbackSanta has a bladder problem, a cookie problem, and a list of children he is legally not allowed to discuss. THE NAUGHTY LIST is a raunchy little Christmas comic for grown-ups — 50 pages of comics and bathroom-reader chaos from the North Pole's worst HR file. Inside: hungover elves, a Mrs. Claus who is ON the list (twice, no regrets), eight reindeer sharing one Porta-Potty, a reindeer with a gambling problem, Santa's leaked search history, the house rules for the North Pole's only bathroom, and a fruitcake that may or may not be a protected witness. This is the Christmas book you keep in the bathroom — where it belongs. Perfect as a stocking stuffer, white elephant gift, or a present for the coworker, dad, brother, or Secret Santa victim who has everything and deserves this. Warning: contains potty humor, naughty humor, and eggnog-related decision making.
📚 'Krappenschitz: Cubicle Chronicles' — on Amazon
 
    Krappenschitz: Cubicle Chronicles: Comic Strips for Grown-Ups Who'd Rather Be Anywhere Else (Toilet Humor)David KrappenschitzEbookDavid Krappenschitz has a job, three roommates-worth of coworkers, and one heroic bathroom. This is his story. Krappenschitz: Cubicle Chronicles is a 64-strip comic collection about the modern workplace and the apartment that makes it bearable — barely. David, Marty, and Zip are coworkers AND roommates, which means the meetings never really end; they just move to the couch. Their boss, Mr. Kline, believes work is a family. Their coworker Greg believes in labeling everything, including the label maker. And Tara — David's girlfriend, the only functional adult in a five-mile radius — is conducting inspections nobody agreed to. Inside: performance reviews weaponized as family meetings, a thermostat cold war, the constitutional crisis of the last square of toilet paper, a couch with assigned seating and a beverage station where a mini fridge used to be. Five chapters: Clocking In · Home Sweet Home · The Throne Room · Greg · Tara, Eventually. For anyone who has ever done their best thinking on the throne — or their best work from it.
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